Tag Archives: humour

Ballet, boots and covetousness…

When you are younger you simply don’t realise the effect some actions will have on the rest of your life.

As a young girl, I was obsessed with ballet, dutifully my parents enrolled me in classes and did everything they could to nurture and provide for my obsession.

Looking back now, I realise that I never had any talent and had as much chance of becoming a ballet dancer as I did an astronaut.  What I did do, with the endless hours of practicing was overdevelop my already genetically disposed calf muscles.

Far too much ballet

Far too much ballet

Huge they are, over-ripped huge.   My tiny, size 3 feet, do not help the issue.  My shorter than average legs only compound the issue.

Knee high boots are infinitely an issue and as each Fall season comes upon us I look longingly upon those who can wear beautiful riding boots with an unmistakable pang of pure killer jealousy.

As with most things in life my overdeveloped calves have a nemesis – the mid calf boot.

A fashion piece that is supposed to be worn loose and relaxed (in a rock chic way) placed on my gigantour calves look like two strained leather tree trunks.  Unlike a wonky nose or undeveloped lady chest, to my knowledge, there is no current cure or plastic surgery option for my problem.  A trip to Harley Street will not help.  I will just have to continue to live in jealously throughout Fall and longingly wait for summer, and the return of the sandal.

my nemesis

my nemesis

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Is it just me or are they breeding..

I was quite content with myself yesterday, my second post was up and the small few that would read my blog would hopefully find it quite humourous.  I went about my business hence after safe in the knowledge that the Panda had been put to bed.  Imagine my disbelief then when I found myself face-to-face with another.  While innocently mooching around the shops over the weekend I encountered PANDA No2!

Panda No2!

Panda No2!

At first I thought that from afar it must be either my imagination or the same lady.  As the panda drew closer with every step I realised this was not the case.  Our beloved bamboo eating bear had a new owner, in fact it wasn’t the same panda at all-they were breeding!   After my disbelief had faded I headed straight home to research and yes it seems that Panda’s, Bears and in fact all manner of beloved animals are avilable as head gear.

http://www.riverisland.com/Online/women/accessories/sunglasses–hats/cream-knitted-panda-with-black-ears-beanie-590174

Cute and quirky as they may be surely this fashion item should be restricted to the under 9s or at the very least for on-the-slopes?

Surely such a piece of clothing cannot be worn with serious intent as surely no-one would take you seriously if you were wearing one?

To prove my point – exhibit A – the beautiful SHAKIRA – sheep on head and a mischievous don’t take me seriously grin on face.  Let me know blog world – is this a mini-trend destined to take over?

Sheep Shakira

Sheep Shakira